Chapter 3: It's not a lie if you didn't know it at the time

"No. None of our physicians do that." the woman at the other end of the line said.

"Never?" I asked.

"No."

Really? I thought to myself. So, what is going on here? I'll bet that weird neighbor has something to do with this. She has a bit of a reputation that I'm sure her husband doesn't know about. Maybe she got my wife involved in something.

Still. There's a lie here somewhere. What did I do to deserve to be lied to?

"You did what?!" my then-wife screamed at me. "Why would you do that? Why can't you just trust me?"

"Because I didn't completely believe your answer and I felt I had a right to know." I said.

"But I told you the answer." she said.

"But it wasn't the truth." I said.

"But you didn't know that at the time."

"So that makes it ok?" I asked.

"Whatever."

"So, why are you carrying condoms?" I asked.

"Whatever. They're for a friend, ok? Are you happy? She's someone I work with and she's been screwing around. She doesn't like her husband very much. And he doesn't like his wife very much and they...you know...hook up at work on her break. She asked me to hold them for her so she wouldn't get caught with them."

"Can I verify that story?" I asked.

"Why do you need to do that?"

"Because I've already been lied to once." I answered.

"Whatever. I'm done. We're done. There's obviously no trust in this relationship." she said.

Really? I can't imagine why.